January Chillers

First up, on the 7th, we’ll get REALLY cold as we head to the Arctic in “The Last Winter.” What’s scarier than drilling into the earth to harvest outdated and environmentally threatening fossil fuels? Possibly Mother Nature’s wrath. Or maybe something supernatural. Or, the consummate evil: mankind itself. I guess we’ll see.

Ugh, city-dwellers, am I right? Always wanting to “get away for a bit” and “head out to the country,” but they never seem to respect the ominous warnings of the last-gas-station-for-100-mile’s wizened, elderly attendant. On the 14th, we’ll encounter just such a naive and flippant family in “Wendigo,” as they face the only thing more terrifying than life without a Starbucks next door: their son’s imagination (and maybe an infamous Algonquin evil spirit).

Let it goooo, let it goooo! Let go of the ski lift before you get stuck on it and the resort closes down for the night! Let it gooo, let it gooo!! I don’t know anything else about this Malaysian horror film! With a title regrettably usurped to international fame a mere three years after its release, the “Frozen” we will be watching on the 21st does NOT take place in the fictional land of Arendelle, but rather on a ski chairlift, high in the air, where three people become stranded after the resort closes. Will there be trolls and ice monsters and talking snowmen? I have absolutely no idea, but we can only hope the musical score lives up to that of its eponymous predecessor.

And finally, after we’ve traveled to the Arctic, (nearly) Canada, and possibly Malaysia, we’ll get to enjoy a nice, relaxing family vacation over the holidays to a remote winter cabin, which has never been historically known to be the likely setting for a snowed-in, insanity-induced murder frenzy. In “The Lodge,” on the 28th, we’ll get to discuss topics such as leaving your children with your new girlfriend without really getting to know her first, and prioritizing family over work.

Before we grab our blankets and put on our coziest socks (and turn on the bathroom lights so we’re not *totally* in the dark), I’d like to introduce myself. I’m Laura, and I’ll be one of your guides to the world of creepy, scary, and awkwardly campy movies going forward. I haven’t seen a lot of movies in my life (except for a bunch of really random German “art” films from a graduate-level film course I once took in college - a big “heeeey” to any other Klaus Kinski fans out there), and most of these are totally new to me. My introductions to the movies consist of whatever short summary offered in a cursory Google search, so if they’re way off, blame Google. I’ll be following up every Thursday movie with a synopsis, including my own uncultured, likely verbose, analysis. Thanks for taking this weekly adventure with me - I look forward to escaping my own nightmarish life with you as we revel in the misfortunes of fictional others!